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Get ready for your new year: Goodbye 2013

This the first of a four worksheet bundle to enable you to start 2014 with some proper added “tra la la la laaaaaaaa”!

Each one is a weekly stage of a larger debriefing and planning journey – my hope is that between your Christmas shopping, wrapping, pantomime horsing about and relaxing,  you’ll be able to hide out for a bit of “me time” and invest in your stretch for 2014.

To give you the big picture, the four worksheets are:

  • Goodbye 2013
  • Decode 2013 (out 12th December)
  • Prioritise 2014 (out 19th December)
  • Activate 2014 (out 26th December)

This week’s worksheet is intended to be enjoyed with a good brew (or yummy mulled wine depending on the time of day!). It’s a nostalgic reminisce, which delivers part cheesy grin and part awkward cringe as you fondly reflect on your 2013.

Download your worksheet here: Get ready for your new year – Goodbye 2013

Please share this with friends, family and colleagues to give them some added oomph to their 2014……have I just solved your present for the person who has everything!? Simply click on the share button on the image at the top of the page or alternatively, if you’ve got a Hootlet, Pinterest or Twitter extension in your internet browser, pop it out through there! (If not google can provide a download :-))

I’d love to hear from you on what comes out of your ponderings this week in the comments. Put the kettle on, grab a printout of the worksheet and a handful of coloured pens and start your year end stretch!

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3 lessons on the speed of change – are you a winner?

I want you to cast your mind back to Aesop’s Fables and specifically, the Hare and the Tortoise story. Remember it? They have a race and the hare thinks “oh the tortoise is sooooo slow, I’m gonna win this easy” and then snoozes away under a tree. The tortoise takes the race at his pace, suiting his actions to his talents – determination, tenacity and courage. Tortoise wins the race, much to hare’s surprise.

Once you set off on your change journey, you can get tangled up in your own hare and tortoise dilemma.

Part of you will, I’m sure, be super keen to speed away towards your goal and then one or both of 2 things happen: You lose energy and drive, take a nap under your tree and then struggle to get going again. Or you get a lead as things come easy to you, so you back off the gas and take a nap under your tree and then struggle to get going again. Complacency isn’t change’s friend – you have to invest your time, effort and energies into making it happen.

Lesson #1: Don’t go at it like a bunny!!

There is also a part of you who REALLLLLLY wants to win your race. A part of you who can picture life in glorious technicolor with your change race won and is going to work at it until you get there.

But you recognise significant, permanent change requires a sustainable pace – your speed of change needs to be the one you can keep up until you cross the finish line. This means you’re able to tackle the easy and tough with the same level of zest, motivation and commitment. Just like the tortoise, who crossed the line at his slow and steady speed.

Lesson #2: Move at your own pace to create sustainable change.

I wonder what the other forest animals made of the betting odds on the start line. Would they have backed the hare as the likely winner? Or gambled on the tortoise’s wisdom? And how would those bets influence the competitor’s mindset?

The spectators and commentators in your change race might also be split on the outcome. Some will back you all the way and others might have some doubts. Whatever the type or size of change you’ll looking to achieve – your mindset and outlook will have a real impact. Who you gonna believe? Those on the sidelines or your gut, your instincts, your inner oomph?

The tortoise may not have been the obvious winner, but I bet he believed he could cross that finishing line ahead of the hare by doing it at his own pace.

Lesson #3: Believe you can win from the b in bang.

Aesop wanted his fables to deliver morals, ethics and strong values to his readers. OK my interpretation is probably not quite what he was thinking, but heck we’ll never know. My b-mail fable seeks to enable you to stretch your life in positive ways.

Enjoy the newness of the starting phase, but don’t let complacency slip in. Be realistic in your pace to ensure you can sustain your energy right across the finishing line and trust your ability to succeed.

How do these 3 lessons apply to your change journey? Have they made you rethink your timescale or shift your race mindset? I’d really like you to share your observations and thoughts in the comments.

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out of inspiration – kickstart your mojo

I spent some of my time today surfing around online and reading emails instead of writing this b-mail. Why? I needed inspiration and there it was, I knew what to write about. How to get unstuck when you’re lacking inspiration.

Whether you’re wanting to get on with your day to day or strategize how you want to shape your life longer term, you’ll need some. You’re asked to write a comms piece at work or have friends coming to dinner – ouch mental block – a spot of Googling might just pop up the answer.

However the long term game is a bit different. Career change, such as switching to a new path, starting your own enterprise, or a life change, like ending a relationship or improving your fitness can need a different type of inspiration to take you from vague idea to achievable, exciting action.

First off, don’t sweat it. Inspiration will come.

Next, where do you usually get your inspiration from? Try those old faithful sources. No joy?

Sometimes, you need to try something out of your norm to get new, fresh results. Edward de Bono (yes him of the 6 hats fame) talks about stepping outside your rivers of thinking. Picture a mountain with several routes for water to flow down it – the water is going to take the easiest option and soon a wide valley is created. But around the edges are little streams, creeks and brooks – the route less travelled. Add a dam and the water seeks a new or alternative routes.

Your brain is just the same – gazillions of neural pathways exist and the ones most regularly travelled become wider and stronger, just like the river. By switching your inspiration method, tool or source, you create a new pathway and like any muscle, with use, it will grow stronger.

So, please have a borrow from some of my favourites. For small ‘a-ha’s of inspiration, check out:

  • pinterest – for words or pictures of wisdom and why not create a board of the thing you’re seeking to achieve?
  • brainpickings – a collection of great thinkers, presented in an easy to read visual format
  • twitter – a short sharp blast of exciting things from people you admire, desire, idolise, add you own word here
  • flick through an old book or two – you know the ones you could hardly put down and reminisce
  • change your workspace – clear the clutter, sit in the bath, face the window or go somewhere else
  • go for a walk – whether to grab a coffee or juice or around the nearest park, take 30 minutes out and try to really take in the sights, sound and smells
  • dance it out – stop, put some music on and do your happy dance, best dad dance, birdy dance….whatever comes to get your blood pumping in time with your songs

And now the big ones:

  • free writing – grab a favourite pen and a big piece of paper, then write. Anything. Pour it all out. No editing. Everything is valid. Let your mind wander until it strikes gold
  • ask a friend to teach you something they’re passionate about – knitting, a new recipe or a mediation technique. All good.
  • write yourself a letter – explain what you’re trying to do and what you need to get going
  • create a perfect patchwork role model of future you (or future job, house, body, etc.) from your various heros and heroines. Let me give you an example, you might want a fitness patchwork you based Jess Ennis-Hill’s abs with Laura Trott’s post race glow (how does she do it!?!) or your new career path might be stitched together from the atmosphere at your favourite coffee bar, a crowd of likeminded people and your personal favourite work items
  • seek others’ perspective – develop a list of questions you need answering and interview people who are doing what you want (or similar), those who have a “stake” in your change (your best mate, your mentor or your bank manager) AND anyone who can add a totally different point of view (your nemesis job holder, your overseas pen pal or a potential customer)
  • and breathe – you don’t need to do it all at once and the best made plans need to flex and grow over time to deliver the most amazing results possible

This week, I’d love you to flex your muscle, try out some new inspirations – go and dive into a new river – plus please share your best ones with us in the comments. I’d love some new dance tunes or a great book or person to stalk…I mean follow….. ahem 😉

  • David

    I’d suggest getting off the computer for a bit lol! Have a coffee with a friend – someone who is clever and independent and let them draw out from you what is already there. Because it is.

    • Sarae

      Hello David!
      You’re right, many of us are in technology overload with our computers, tablet devices, smartphones and the like on all the time.

      I love your sense that everyone is resourceful and can provide from within – a key belief I hold true as a coach.

      Thanks for commenting!

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Who’s your Coach in Team U

Hey, you said you wanted something more, something different, something better in your life. That’s where a coach comes in handy!

I mean it’s so easy to get researching, analysing, discussing, reading, investigating, addressing any risks or potential to fail, planning…. and the list goes on and on and on and on. What happens? Nothing. You make minimal or no impact on your life, you just learn a lot of new information and waste time with endless details and searches. You stay well within your comfort zone and life goes on……..just as it is.

Working with a coach means you get someone’s 100% attention on what you want to achieve – new direction, greater authenticity, action planning, job promotion, new habits or motivation and courage to move forward in some other way. They will help you progress from analysis paralysis, being overwhelmed and going in circles of data, research and procrastination, to taking action and making real change happen.

Your coach is there to provide a safe and supportive environment to explore, understand and clarify each step, behaviour and action. Not only do they offer non-judgmental challenge, through open questions and application of their skills in understanding others, they also bring an intense belief that you can truly do whatever you set out to do. (ok, they’re not going to let you do anything dangerous or illegal, but that’s the exceptions to the rule!)

They can also act as an accountability partner for you – celebrating your successes and sharing your pain at the failures as well as enabling you to understand what made those outcomes happen and how to replicate or avoid them in the future.

If you’d like more info on how I work with people as a coach, pop over to b-coach page.

What would you love a coach in your team to help you with? Shout them out below or over on Facebook and see what this coach has to suggest!

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go pro in Team U to achieve your stretch

Making big changes to your life, career, health, even your hairstyle can be fraught with questions you can’t answer, doubts about getting started and importantly who to turn to for help. OK I’m not gifted in the hair department (I love my curls!), but I do know a thing or two about adding stretch. I know those who share their change, seek inputs and support make the change with style and in less time than those who go it alone:

  • Career changer? If you are keen to move to a competitor or a new role, tell others you want it and instantly increase the number of people looking for your perfect opportunity!
  • Life changer? Maybe you want a better work/life balance or to adopt new health or thinking habit?  Tell others and you’ll get “real life” angels and devils on your shoulders to motivate and push you to succeed.

I think you need a team.

Friends and family can be on your team; they share brilliant advice and suggestions, because they know you really well and want the very best for you. They just don’t get to play every part. Sometimes, they can also be clouded by a desire to protect you or are super comfortable with you just as you are. You need to include some professionals to provide impartial insights and learn through their skills and experience to avoid wasting your time, efforts and money.

Let me give you an example: me.

When I announced my intention to work a 4 day week and study to be a Pilates Teacher, my parents got concerned about my bills, my other half worried about us getting a mortgage, my friends figured I’d have no time for them. All valid concerns and said to ensure I didn’t get into a terrible mess, which I am grateful for. But this wasn’t going to get me thorough 2 years+ of training, practice and exams and ultimately, towards the life I wanted.

I went out and widened my team. Holly, my Pilates teacher became my mentor. My osteopath, Richard, became a fountain of all things anatomy related. My coach, Steph, provided me with encouragement by simply believing I could be successful and helping me to challenge beliefs that were limiting my progress. I read all sorts of blogs, books and experts’ sites. I built a network of peers and learned from their triumphs and failures.

The best thing was I never felt alone – there was always someone to turn to – friend, family, peer, professional. And here I am running my own business, supporting wonderful people in their life stretch and change as a coach, trainer and Pilates teacher. My bills get paid, I have a mortgage and by following my passions, I’m happier. Especially knowing I’m part of your team! Thank you for reading my b-mails, sharing and commenting on Facebook or tweeting my content – and don’t forget, you can also explore this site for other ways I can help. (new page alert!)

Who’s on your team? Who needs a new role to play and importantly, who’s missing? Tell me in the comments about your team and what role they play in “Team U”.

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