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you need to move it, move it – body and mind in action

September 12, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail, b-train
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You all know I’m passionate about how your body and mind work – especially how one can support the other’s change.

Two of my favourite experts are Amy Cuddy, a Harvard Social Psychologist and Doctor Dance aka Peter Lovatt of the Dance Psychology lab. Both work to learn how moving our bodies affects our brains – in Cuddy’s case to see how hormones change our peformance and Peter uses dance to change our abilities and mood.

Your self-perception of your abilities to do something can creep out into your body language – if you’re unsure or lacking confidence, your body posture will typically become smaller. You might cross your arms, avoid eye contact or fidget with your hands. However, feeling great about yourself makes you stand a touch taller, smile more and exude more warmth.

Amy and her team started to measure 2 hormone changes, testosterone and cortisol. The first you’ll know is the “male” hormone and affects our risk taking and the second is the “stress” hormone. Her research focused on hormonal changes in students as they were interviewed. Prior to the interview, some were asked to “power pose” – large, open body postures – and others to adopt low status poses – ie hunched over to make themselves smaller with limbs crossed.

The results? Power posing tricks the brain into increasing testosterone and decreasing cortisol: students relaxed and felt more confident. Importantly, they performed better in their interviews.

The Dance Psychology lab is seeking to understand why dancing changes the way we feel. I saw Doctor Dance at a School of Life Sunday Sermon and did some curvy belly dancing and line dancing. Shoulder shimmying and swirling arms open up our creative thinking; whilst the squarer steps gave our logic problem solving skills a boost. WOW! You can watch the sermon here on his next School of Life event page, a dance night in October. I’ll be there and hope you’ll join me.

I use a combination of these to raise my game, increase my personal impact and inspiration. With teams, I’ve incorporated power posing to presentation and influencing skills training and worked with individuals to increase their confidence ahead of difficult situations. By changing body position, posture, gestures and so on, you can make your brain function better, change your mood and open up opportunities. Bringing your body and mind into harmony

Do you consider your body when approaching a situation where you want to be at your best or when your mood needs an uplift? Let us know in the comments; what you do and any favourite tracks to get you moving!

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be the real authentic you!

September 5, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail
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Over the years, I’ve taken stacks of courses, workshops, seminars and the like. I find it impossible to encourage others to learn and grow, if I’m not doing it myself. I’m delighted to have a well stocked “kit bag” to dip into. Nothing goes in without my explicit approval.

I often get asked why I bother. Surely I’ve got enough to work with by now? Others might say “yes, you bet I do”, but they’re not me. My answer is “nope, not if I’m to be authentic”. I hold myself up as an example of personal growth and change to my clients, tribe and peers but I’m by no means perfect, nor does it always come easy! I’ve got ambitions and I need to continue to change and stretch myself to get them cracked.

b-elastic came about as a platform to support individuals and groups to explore their purpose in life and career, discover their joys and overcome their pains as they moved to achieving and living their purpose. I combine my love of coaching, training and Pilates to do that. And to be authentic, I invest in my own knowledge, practice and skills to bring more to my clients’ personal change journeys as well as my own.

So this week, no tips, no theory or tools to try out. I invite you to invest in your stretch by pondering a few questions about being the real you and committing to amplifying your authenticity this week. Take some notes, draw a picture or create a mindmap as a memory aid and motivator – put it somewhere you’ll see it every day to keep your motivation.

Your 4 short questions to ponder:

  1. What does authentic mean to you?
  2. How do you live up to your definition of authentic?
  3. List out what you can do to dial up your authenticity
  4. Pick 3 things from your list to do this week – one your head says “doh obvious!”, one that makes your heart sing for joy and one for today to get you started!

Hold yourself accountable for your own authentic change or why not use the comments below or our Facebook page as your accountability partner? Post your 3 actions and I’ll be there to support and cheerlead you through an even more authentic week!

If those questions get you in a spin, why not get in touch? I love helping you explore purpose, goals and ambitions – this type of dilemma is perfect for coaching with me!

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back to work tension – keep that summer feeling!

August 29, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail, b-Pilates
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Boooo the end of the summer is round the corner and most of us will be back into the office, until our next break. Can you feel the work tension rising? From your lower back, between your shoulders, up your neck until your head is being squished. Not great. Terrible, in fact. Let’s stop it now.

Are you sitting properly? Both feet on the floor? Bum back in the seat pad? Hands and wrists supported on your desk or chair arms? These 3 things can help you protect your lower back and neck from tension, stiffness and that horrid tightness. I’ll ask again, are you sitting properly? Move it buster.

Take regular breaks – get up, move around, trot up and down the stairs, make a brew for your colleagues, look out a window, breath deeply. Just don’t be that annoying person who interrupts me cos they’re on a break 🙂

Frame your desk with memories of good times. A snapshot or postcard, a stone off your beach, theatre tickets, menu of a fab meal. No office is so uptight, you can’t keep these somewhere to look at to boost your mood and energy (desk drawer, inside your note book, screensaver, scanned document, be creative!)

And with my Pilates hat on, try these simple neck stretches:

1)   D-shape cycles: Look straight ahead, turn your head to the left, roll your gaze down in an arc to look at your knees/toes, keep rolling up until you’re looking to the right. Turn to the front and go again. Repeat in both directions. You’re effectively drawing a D on its tummy, a horizontal straight line and a semi-circle.

2)   Neck side stretch: put your finger on your chin, this is the unmovable, absolute centre of a circle. Then rotate about this point with your nose drawing an arc, as you lower your ear to your shoulder. You’ll get a lovely stretch from the opposite ear to the point of your opposite shoulder. Hold for a few breaths and come back up to the start. Repeat both sides.

Keep going, recognise when you’re getting stressed, the earlier you tackle it, the less likely you’re gonna get it bad.  Our next holidays will be here before we know it!

If you’d like to change your reaction – physical or emotional – to tension and stress, I’d be delighted to help. I’ve successfully worked with clients to change their reactions to triggers and develop new practices, so get in touch.

How do you stop tension in its tracks? Do tell me below how you are going to prolong your summer feeling.

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comfortably uncomfortable – your brain’s reaction to change

August 22, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail, b-Pilates, b-train
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This was a phrase I’ve picked up from an innovation trainer. He said, “to unlearn old ways of thinking and learn new ones, you need to get comfortably uncomfortable.” I had to ponder this one. We’ve all heard the statement about when you step outside your comfort zone, that’s where you really grow. Yet we rarely hear about how that can make us feel. Somehow this new description really grabs me – doing something new or different to your norms can really make you feel a touch anxious or scared.

Why does this happen? The part of your brain for complex thinking is called the prefrontal cortex and sits just behind your forehead. It is accessed via the amygdala, the emotional centre. Let’s look at an example – you decide to try a new fitness plan or start a new course or take a new job (that’s the complex thinking bit of the brain working) and you feel really chuffed to have made a decision, but then you get that uncomfortable feeling about getting started, the energy required to succeed or what you have to sacrifice along the road (that’s the emotional centre getting heard!).

Hang in there. I’ve got a brain-friendly fix to help your amygdala feel heard and help you move forward with being comfortably uncomfortable.

Take 2 minutes out from whatever you’re doing and just be still. Now focus your attention on your feelings. List them out one by one, either in your head, out loud or jot them down – whatever suits you. Simply acknowledge each of them like the face of an old friend passing by the window. You’ll notice how you can now concentrate on the action or task in hand, without further energy going to dealing with your emotions.

Getting comfortably uncomfortable is a key skill to acquire if you are going to make the shift you want in your life.  Try this technique out whenever you need to move past your emotions, to focus on whatever you’re doing.

Right before you go, answer these 2 for me in the comments:

  1. What’s your way to deal with feeling uncomfortable? (Biscuits or chocolate? Long runs? Call a mate?)
  2. How did your brain react to this acknowledgement technique?

If you’d like to try out more brain-friendly techniques to help you explore and achieve real change in your life, book a coaching session with me.

  • Grace • August 28, 2013

    1. Unnecessary banter/chat/noise. 2. Uh-oh…

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saying no – make space for change

August 14, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail
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Since 2008, I’ve been teaching Pilates, doing various learning and development roles, playing in a band, seeing friends, visiting places, learning new stuff, enjoying my wonderful partner, becoming a very proud godmother and more. Oh and building to going solo in 2013. It’s been a struggle trying to find a balance (hmmm note to self: get real, it still is at times!) and yes I’ve messed up, missed things and managed to both upset and please a few folks along the way.

The view from my desk :-)

The view from my desk 🙂

I want to stretch my life, just as you do. I want to enjoy every minute. I want lovely people in it, at work, at home and in play. I want more time by the seaside with the wind in my hair. I want two miniature dachshunds. AND I want to be a catalyst for others’ change and stretch to create the lives they want and deserve.

One of my big “a-ha” moments was to get focused. What is really important? What is helping me get where I want to be and what’s hindering me? (Let me know if you’re interested in my musings on the first two for future b-mails) I recognised I got one BIG blocker, my “yes” reflex is WAY stronger than my “no” reflex. After all saying “yes” is being generous with my time, talents and love, right?

It’s also a wonderful way to side track, dodge and postpone change. Jim Rohn also has a take on this: “If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.” Mine is to say “yes” at the expense of my own change.

So, I’m taking a stance – why not join me? – I’m laser focused and will be saying no to build, motivate and create positive change in my life and in others’. How? Good question.

First off, I’m going to hold off my “yes” and ask a question or two. Of myself – how much do I value this person and how could this fit into my picture?

By sense checking my response to my goals and moderating it against my relationships, I’m finding a way to make this decision in a way that fits my values (Notice in my big picture, people feature A LOT!) and keeps stretching my life.

I’m able to soften saying no by explaining the misfit to my laser focus and I’ve found those who respect and care for me, value my honesty. I still cheat sometimes and say yes and negotiate a different scope or timeline, but I keep trying. I want to stretch my life – and say yes to the work, fun and people that make it so brilliant!

Does this resonate with you? Are you reading this with a little voice saying “hey, I do that!”. Let’s build a list to help us all in saying no to get us where we want to be! How do you say no to make space for your change?

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