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smell your roses – gratitude for what you’ve got

October 10, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail, b-Pilates, b-train
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Over the last few weeks, lots of people around me in person and online are talking about gratitude. It’s catching – I’ve been at it too; with clients, friends and even posting photos on my Facebook timelines about it.

What I’ve noticed is when they do it a big fat grin spreads across their face. They seem more alive, more in the moment and more radiant.

How’s it work? One of my favourite people taught me this “energy flows, where attention goes” – thank you Carol x. By recognising what you have to be grateful for in your life, the people around you, inside you and so on turns your attention to these small, but significant pieces of happiness in your life. And small things when brought together make a huge, ginormous collection of wonderful things.

Your energy gets poured into enjoying and cherishing the positives in your life, rather than dwelling on the negatives. The head and the heart take pleasure in this; your mood improves, your energy levels increase to tackle the next thing.

Here’s a glimpse of what’s in my collection right now:

  • Opportunity to learn with likeminded people
  • Collaborating with inspiring people on great client projects
  • A big bunch of my favourite bluey purple hydrangeas

my favourites

  • Having my dinner made for me after a hard, long day
  • My new business cards looking so cute
  • Finding our new wall calendar for 2014 on etsy
  • Enormous smiles on whatsapp from our goddaughter
  • Giving my sister an a-ha moment
  • Oh and how could I forget my sneakers – love, love, love them, but guess you already know that 🙂

Post by b-elastic.

 

Wow even writing that list has made me feel more awake than any coffee or green smoothie could. Why don’t you try it? Take a couple of minutes each day and ask yourself what are you grateful for right now?

Help yourself over that mid-afternoon slump, build momentum to complete a daunting task or person and for moving towards that life stretch you desire.

Create a visual prompt – like this beautiful desktop wallpaper – each time you close down your docs, spread sheets and email, take a split second to count one rose. (This is by the lovely Nicole Wise Sturt) Or use a journal by your bedside to jot your gems down. Why not make a pinterest board?

And to get you rolling, why not share yours in the comments or on the Facebook page?

PS 2 more for my list – I’m grateful to share my b-mails with you and your reading them xx

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Who’s your Coach in Team U

September 26, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail
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Hey, you said you wanted something more, something different, something better in your life. That’s where a coach comes in handy!

I mean it’s so easy to get researching, analysing, discussing, reading, investigating, addressing any risks or potential to fail, planning…. and the list goes on and on and on and on. What happens? Nothing. You make minimal or no impact on your life, you just learn a lot of new information and waste time with endless details and searches. You stay well within your comfort zone and life goes on……..just as it is.

Working with a coach means you get someone’s 100% attention on what you want to achieve – new direction, greater authenticity, action planning, job promotion, new habits or motivation and courage to move forward in some other way. They will help you progress from analysis paralysis, being overwhelmed and going in circles of data, research and procrastination, to taking action and making real change happen.

Your coach is there to provide a safe and supportive environment to explore, understand and clarify each step, behaviour and action. Not only do they offer non-judgmental challenge, through open questions and application of their skills in understanding others, they also bring an intense belief that you can truly do whatever you set out to do. (ok, they’re not going to let you do anything dangerous or illegal, but that’s the exceptions to the rule!)

They can also act as an accountability partner for you – celebrating your successes and sharing your pain at the failures as well as enabling you to understand what made those outcomes happen and how to replicate or avoid them in the future.

If you’d like more info on how I work with people as a coach, pop over to b-coach page.

What would you love a coach in your team to help you with? Shout them out below or over on Facebook and see what this coach has to suggest!

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go pro in Team U to achieve your stretch

September 19, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail, b-Pilates, b-train
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Making big changes to your life, career, health, even your hairstyle can be fraught with questions you can’t answer, doubts about getting started and importantly who to turn to for help. OK I’m not gifted in the hair department (I love my curls!), but I do know a thing or two about adding stretch. I know those who share their change, seek inputs and support make the change with style and in less time than those who go it alone:

  • Career changer? If you are keen to move to a competitor or a new role, tell others you want it and instantly increase the number of people looking for your perfect opportunity!
  • Life changer? Maybe you want a better work/life balance or to adopt new health or thinking habit?  Tell others and you’ll get “real life” angels and devils on your shoulders to motivate and push you to succeed.

I think you need a team.

Friends and family can be on your team; they share brilliant advice and suggestions, because they know you really well and want the very best for you. They just don’t get to play every part. Sometimes, they can also be clouded by a desire to protect you or are super comfortable with you just as you are. You need to include some professionals to provide impartial insights and learn through their skills and experience to avoid wasting your time, efforts and money.

Let me give you an example: me.

When I announced my intention to work a 4 day week and study to be a Pilates Teacher, my parents got concerned about my bills, my other half worried about us getting a mortgage, my friends figured I’d have no time for them. All valid concerns and said to ensure I didn’t get into a terrible mess, which I am grateful for. But this wasn’t going to get me thorough 2 years+ of training, practice and exams and ultimately, towards the life I wanted.

I went out and widened my team. Holly, my Pilates teacher became my mentor. My osteopath, Richard, became a fountain of all things anatomy related. My coach, Steph, provided me with encouragement by simply believing I could be successful and helping me to challenge beliefs that were limiting my progress. I read all sorts of blogs, books and experts’ sites. I built a network of peers and learned from their triumphs and failures.

The best thing was I never felt alone – there was always someone to turn to – friend, family, peer, professional. And here I am running my own business, supporting wonderful people in their life stretch and change as a coach, trainer and Pilates teacher. My bills get paid, I have a mortgage and by following my passions, I’m happier. Especially knowing I’m part of your team! Thank you for reading my b-mails, sharing and commenting on Facebook or tweeting my content – and don’t forget, you can also explore this site for other ways I can help. (new page alert!)

Who’s on your team? Who needs a new role to play and importantly, who’s missing? Tell me in the comments about your team and what role they play in “Team U”.

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you need to move it, move it – body and mind in action

September 12, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail, b-train
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You all know I’m passionate about how your body and mind work – especially how one can support the other’s change.

Two of my favourite experts are Amy Cuddy, a Harvard Social Psychologist and Doctor Dance aka Peter Lovatt of the Dance Psychology lab. Both work to learn how moving our bodies affects our brains – in Cuddy’s case to see how hormones change our peformance and Peter uses dance to change our abilities and mood.

Your self-perception of your abilities to do something can creep out into your body language – if you’re unsure or lacking confidence, your body posture will typically become smaller. You might cross your arms, avoid eye contact or fidget with your hands. However, feeling great about yourself makes you stand a touch taller, smile more and exude more warmth.

Amy and her team started to measure 2 hormone changes, testosterone and cortisol. The first you’ll know is the “male” hormone and affects our risk taking and the second is the “stress” hormone. Her research focused on hormonal changes in students as they were interviewed. Prior to the interview, some were asked to “power pose” – large, open body postures – and others to adopt low status poses – ie hunched over to make themselves smaller with limbs crossed.

The results? Power posing tricks the brain into increasing testosterone and decreasing cortisol: students relaxed and felt more confident. Importantly, they performed better in their interviews.

The Dance Psychology lab is seeking to understand why dancing changes the way we feel. I saw Doctor Dance at a School of Life Sunday Sermon and did some curvy belly dancing and line dancing. Shoulder shimmying and swirling arms open up our creative thinking; whilst the squarer steps gave our logic problem solving skills a boost. WOW! You can watch the sermon here on his next School of Life event page, a dance night in October. I’ll be there and hope you’ll join me.

I use a combination of these to raise my game, increase my personal impact and inspiration. With teams, I’ve incorporated power posing to presentation and influencing skills training and worked with individuals to increase their confidence ahead of difficult situations. By changing body position, posture, gestures and so on, you can make your brain function better, change your mood and open up opportunities. Bringing your body and mind into harmony

Do you consider your body when approaching a situation where you want to be at your best or when your mood needs an uplift? Let us know in the comments; what you do and any favourite tracks to get you moving!

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be the real authentic you!

September 5, 2013
inb-coach, b-mail
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Over the years, I’ve taken stacks of courses, workshops, seminars and the like. I find it impossible to encourage others to learn and grow, if I’m not doing it myself. I’m delighted to have a well stocked “kit bag” to dip into. Nothing goes in without my explicit approval.

I often get asked why I bother. Surely I’ve got enough to work with by now? Others might say “yes, you bet I do”, but they’re not me. My answer is “nope, not if I’m to be authentic”. I hold myself up as an example of personal growth and change to my clients, tribe and peers but I’m by no means perfect, nor does it always come easy! I’ve got ambitions and I need to continue to change and stretch myself to get them cracked.

b-elastic came about as a platform to support individuals and groups to explore their purpose in life and career, discover their joys and overcome their pains as they moved to achieving and living their purpose. I combine my love of coaching, training and Pilates to do that. And to be authentic, I invest in my own knowledge, practice and skills to bring more to my clients’ personal change journeys as well as my own.

So this week, no tips, no theory or tools to try out. I invite you to invest in your stretch by pondering a few questions about being the real you and committing to amplifying your authenticity this week. Take some notes, draw a picture or create a mindmap as a memory aid and motivator – put it somewhere you’ll see it every day to keep your motivation.

Your 4 short questions to ponder:

  1. What does authentic mean to you?
  2. How do you live up to your definition of authentic?
  3. List out what you can do to dial up your authenticity
  4. Pick 3 things from your list to do this week – one your head says “doh obvious!”, one that makes your heart sing for joy and one for today to get you started!

Hold yourself accountable for your own authentic change or why not use the comments below or our Facebook page as your accountability partner? Post your 3 actions and I’ll be there to support and cheerlead you through an even more authentic week!

If those questions get you in a spin, why not get in touch? I love helping you explore purpose, goals and ambitions – this type of dilemma is perfect for coaching with me!

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